Most people would agree that thoughtful behavior and common decency are in short supply, or simply forgotten in hurried lives of emails, cellphones, and multi-tasking. In Choosing Civility, P. M. Forni identifies the twenty-five rules that are most essential in connecting effectively and happily with others. In clear, witty, and, well…civilized language, Forni covers topics that include:
* Think Twice Before Asking Favors
* Give Constructive Criticism
* Refrain from Idle Complaints
* Respect Others’ Opinions
* Don’t Shift Responsibility and Blame
* Care for Your Guests
* Accept and Give Praise
Honestly, I really struggled with this book. The fact that an adult business book focuses on the Golden Rule of “do unto others…” makes me very concerned for our society. Maybe it’s meant to be a refresher on the topic?
I learned most of the “rules” outlined in this book from my parents, family and friends when I was growing up as a child and throughout high school and college. I was encouraged to put myself in situations where I could put these “rules” into practice. Are individuals growing up without learning these basic tenants of civil society?
There are a few instances in this book where the author describes how one could deal with situations in which we are surrounded by those we perceive as inconsiderate. So, that’s helpful. But again, what he suggests is also common sense.
Have you ever read this book? What are your thoughts?
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Yes, I have read the book. I found the book very helpful. When one is not an American born, he/she tend to apply the behavior learned in his/her own country to the new home country (The US). Due to cultural differences, one could be perceived as rude it he/she tries to applied what was learned at home to this new village. This books is almost like a guide for foreigners in this new land, and a great reminder for locals!
Thanks for your comment, Clemen! I hadn’t thought about it as a primer for foreigners new to the American culture!